Winning and Losing

I had a conversation with a friend this weekend about winning and losing.  He commented to me that he had spent most of his life trying not to lose rather than trying to win.  There is, obviously, a fundamental difference between these two.  So I started thinking about the various games that we play each day--the game of work, the game of school, the game of life.

These days, we all spend time trying not to lose.  This seems to show one of two sides of people.  It can breed in some a competitive side that people often call "playing to win," but it isn't.  It's trying to screw others over so that YOU don't lose.  The other side of trying not to lose is giving up so much, because "you're going to lose anyway."

Trying to win is an interesting concept.  People define it in many ways.  Many think that eliminating all competition is winning.  They will do it by whatever means necessary!  If it means tattling, they will tattle.  If it means screwing others over, they will.  If it means putting on a nice face and feigning politeness, they'll do that too.  Anything.  Literally.

But the way I look at it, winning may mean eliminating the competition.  But I see it as eliminating the competition by altruism and collaboration rather than by screwing others over, or just trying to be "the best." See, true winning is done by honest means, not by witholding the notes your classmate asked for, because they were sick that day, just so that you can score higher on the upcoming test.  True winning is done by learning from your mistakes, so that you don't make the same mistake twice.  True winning is collaborating with your competitors, so that together, you all bring a piece to the puzzle and build the best thing possible.

Schools these days don't breed that.  SURE, we talk about collaboration, but do we do it? No.  Teachers don't collaborate (Latin and History could do something together...Latin and Science....etc...), and we don't encourage it among our students either.  As long as they are getting The Grades, we don't care.

The paradigm IS shifting though, especially among newer teachers.  We are beginning to encourage true winning now--building community and sharing and collaboration.  What have you done to encourage this?  What steps can we take to keep encouraging true winning, rather than fear of losing?  How can we shift the paradigm to playing to win rather than trying not to lose?