It came off amazingly well. We had mostly family there, and a few close friends.
But it occurred to me as we were all assembled to eat Brunch, that this is not normally a "community." Family or not, my extended family doesn't always get along--I am, after all, the child of two black sheep.
Anyway, it was, by far, the most civil any of my extended family members have been to me or to my parents. There were real discussions, about actual issues, and not just awkward small talk.
So why did this happen? Part of this, I truly believe, was Brian and I brainstorming topics that anyone could discuss without getting too opinionated ahead of time. But finally, things were starting to head that way. I was a bit nervous, but I let the discussion go, rather than trying to change the subject.
Suddenly, there were real discussions among my family. This has never happened before. At first, I wondered if they wanted to act "normal" in front of our friends, but I realized that has never stopped them before! It also occurred to me that usually, our family eats buffet style at holidays. This time, I made us all have a sit down meal at a table!
So, I got to thinking about how this works in schools. Why is it that my students have great, real, open discussions? Because, even with rows of chairs, I emphasize the "table." We are not eating/learning "buffet style." We are learning with everyone's opinions. You can't pick and choose. "Be polite--eat at least a piece of the the brussels sprouts" turns into "listen to and respect everyone." Don't take only what you want. You have to listen to the difficult conversations too!
With all of that said, what are we going to do to make our classrooms not "buffet style?" How are we going to get that process started today?
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